A Reiki Healing.

These past four months have been a challenging yet fruitful learning experience filled with uncomfortable emotions, confusion, brokenness, and heartache. Grief is a process that I wish upon no one, yet, it is an experience that we all must [and should] endure at one point in our life. Grief teaches us how to be resilient, intuitive, and self-compassionate. It opens our eyes to unknown pain and trauma; or what I like to call ‘untasty leftovers’ from past experiences. Discomfort signals change, growth, and healing. It awakens our souls to new beginnings; hope, perseverance, and possibility.

Thus, in my journey I have utilized an ‘all-hands-on-deck’ approach to my healing; therapy, yoga, dance, medication, coffee sessions with friends, writing, traveling, and Reiki therapy. While some of you may scratch your head in confusion and others may roll their eyes in jest; hear me out. Reiki is a Japanese healing practice, developed by Buddhist Mikao Usui, that relies on touch and energy. In Japanese, it translates as “vapor” and “ghost,” however, we know that not all translations are perfect. Instead, many have referred to it as, “life force energy.” Therapeutically, it is a technique based on the principle of a therapist channeling physical energy to promote emotional well-being and energy restoration.

Now, I am not drinking peyote, chanting, and smudging sage when I go to Reiki. [Although, that is my life goal: to become like Frankie from Grace & Frankie.] However, my therapist does rely on essential oils to clear the air and he utilizes a tuning fork to center my energy. Reiki healing is mainly contingent upon the patient’s ability to be open, receptive, and self-aware. Energy is our life force; it is all powerful, all encompassing, and ever-present. There have been times where I have laid on the table thinking, “Uh, nothing is happening.” Instead, my therapist reminds me to be patient and to just let myself be. The more open and receptive I am, the more I receive in my sessions.

Last night’s Reiki session was i n c r e d i b l e.

I went into my session feeling blocked, defeated, and more depressed than ever. I have experienced some negative emotions lately; I am angry with myself that it has taken me nearly 5 months to heal from a broken heart and that I have not been able to “let go”. After all, I felt as if I was doing all the right things by going to therapy, meditating, taking dance classes, not skipping my medicine in the morning, and reading every self-help book under the sun. Deep down, I know full well that healing takes time, patience, and self-compassion. Yet, I still felt heavy, blocked, and just plain sad. [I apologize to all my Brown-line friends for having to watch me cry on the train home]. I needed the energy to clear… and quickly.

My therapist did not judge my cloudy spirit; instead, he smiled and said, “Don’t worry, there is good energy here today.” And so we began our session.

The session started out unusually different, as he wasn’t playing his normal woodland forest playlist, and he didn’t use his tuning fork. My mind was also busy with tasks from work I didn’t finish, my dirty apartment, and worrying about things I shouldn’t be worried about. [Thanks, anxiety]. The minutes soon passed by quickly, and I felt a dynamic shift of energy throughout the session. My body and mind relaxed as one. Then, I heard my therapist cough a bit, as if he couldn’t clear his throat, and wondered if he was alright. He shifted towards my feet and as he placed his hand on my right foot, all I could see was a soft blue light [my eyes were closed]. I opened them suddenly, and it was gone and the coughing immediately stopped.

We ended our session shortly thereafter, and I dutifully drank my water with lemon. During this time, we usually share our experiences with one another and compare notes on how we both felt in the session. My therapist started off, “I apologize if you heard me cough — but apparently you had something trapped and it desperately wanted to get out. I felt as though you were blocked near your throat, which is when I started coughing uncontrollably.”

I then told him about my own experiences and sensations throughout the session, especially seeing the blue light towards the end. His eyes lit up with fascination. He responded with, “Interesting… it all makes sense, now.”

The best [and sometimes infuriating] characteristics about my therapist is that he never forces a conclusion nor does he provide concrete answers. He mainly nods his head in agreement, affirms how responsive my energy is to his techniques, and, he ends with, “Enjoy your Reiki ‘high’ this evening.” [And I always do.]

When I got home last night, I was curious about what I experienced and so I consulted my trusted friend, Google.

Google: ‘Blue light experienced in Reiki.’ [Gets lost in hundreds of articles and websites about color therapy, chakras, and Reiki techniques].

Here is what I learned and it is quite fascinating:

The color blue is associated with the 5th chakra. In Hinduism, the throat signifies the 5th chakra, which is Vishuddha in Sanskrit. Vishuddha means purity and is the center for communication, self-expression, listening, and decision-making. A balanced throat chakra allows one to connect with suppressed desires, emotions, or feelings and accurately express them. Blue stones or crystals are often used to balance chakras, such as aquamarine, turquoise, and blue tormaline.

Communication has been a struggle y’all. I have felt blocked in my speech, whether it is written or verbal communication. I have neglected texting my friends, I struggled with writing a recent paper for school, I have ignored e-mails, and I have struggled with expressing how I feel in therapy. Lately, I have just felt out of balance and not myself. Last night’s session was reaffirming that my energy has been blocked. How incredible is it to have an intuitive healer and practitioner who knows what you need before you know yourself?

This morning, I woke up feeling like I had something to say. I wrote a poem, a thank you card to my family, and this very blog post. My thoughts organized neatly, I identified and cleared some emotions I have been struggling with lately, and I sang in the shower — a favorite pastime I have neglected for some time now. It felt as though I lost my voice; my identity, my core, and life purpose.

This is the magic behind Reiki — reading and balancing life force energy to ensure healing, development, and well-being of one’s spirit.

Namaste.

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